Monday, January 9, 2012

Peace Be The Journey

Rule #1 of the Military: Nothing is certain.

December was a long month. January is starting to feel just as long.  My husband's tour here in Maine is going to be coming to a close soon (read: June 2012), and now more than ever: I'm locked in an internal debate. I started a new job in November knowing that my time here was going to be on the short side ... but from my perspective: I've been getting hosed on the job market for one reason or another and dammit, if I have a good opportunity: I'm taking it. So I did. I wasn't anticipating that I would eventually consider the fact that it might be better for my career in the long-run if I stay at my current position for a solid 12 months and re-evaluate whether or not I'll continue to stay here.

After a chat with my husband, we unanimously decided that if he receives orders for a location on the east coast; I will not be moving with him, and instead will move into a studio apartment downtown. He will go into geo-bachelor housing so that I can retain BAH. I would also maintain "custody" of our cat and dog considering they would not be allowed into the geo-bach living arrangements.

But we haven't reached a decision about what to do if we receive orders for the West Coast ... do I go with him? Or do I stay?

All of this is fine and good ... except that we requested orders in August, and his tour will be complete this summer. Originally, the excuse was "Well, we don't really have a budget ironed out yet..."
Fine, no problem. I totally understand.
I stop being so understanding when it turns out that there are people in his office that started several months after he did already have orders.
What the heck kind of sense does THAT make?
Husband has been in his career planner & SgtMajor's face about this since October; at this point: they're both sick of him and aren't any closer to giving us an answer.

I've had a lot weighing on my mind, but the shit-kicker reality check here is that I really can't do much until we have orders. It's all fine and good to do all the planning in the world, but without that final puzzle piece? It's a little like putting unnecessary stress on yourself.

I'm a planner.
I hate flying by the seat of my pants.
I always have Options A, B & C laid out.
This is one of those times I need to just ... stop.

I really need peace in my life. I need to let go of all the baggage I'm carrying around and just trust that it's going to work out. It's going to be okay. I have legitimate concerns and questions, but really, T ... just breathe.

I do get the feeling that we may not be assigned to one of our desired locations. The units @ the 8th & I Barracks in D.C. and the Marine Corps unit @ NAS Oceana in Virginia Beach are both very small; there may not be a spot available for him. Considering the military is broke -- they may not want to send us to Kane'ohe Bay in Hawaii, just like they may not want to spend the money to send us back to San Diego.

Somehow, I get the impression that Option E: None of the Above ... Camp LeJeune is a more realistic option.


  1. There are always sooooo many options. I'm sure you'll choose the right one. And if I can sway you in anyway...I'll be in Maine in July. hint, hint!

  2. ;) summers in Maine are much more pleasant than the mid-atlantic ...

    I suck at Patience. If I had Patience, I wouldn't be so antsy about at least knowing where the next 3-4 years of my life is going to end up.

  3. Kudos for practicing patience! It's hard to come by in a situation like this, but I think you're doing an fabulous job taking it all in stride and having flexible plans.

    When I was preggers with my second, I found out that women with later due dates had their c-sections scheduled before me... and I was only a few weeks away from my DD! I went to that hospital and stayed there with a cranky 18 month old until I got what I wanted. Maybe your hubby just needs to go to his boss' office and not leave until it's sorted out. You can borrow my cranky 2 year old. :)

  4. The other people: It probably has something to do with their MOS, rank, and where they wanted to go. Was there a spot? Do they have an MOS that's easy to place? Was that rank needed there? etc... usually people who don't care where they go, end up getting order super fast.

    I am thinking because you guys put together a wish list, they are probably waiting to see if a spot for Drewby's rank in one of those locations opens up so they can get him in there, and that's why others are getting orders before you guys.

    That's my educated guess. But, seriously T, sit tight. I know it's stressful, but this is the life- wait wait wait and nothing is constant or certain. :/

  5. That's a tough situation. :| Even if patience eludes you, take some solace in knowing that you've dealt with difficulty before, and you'll pull out one way or another...even if that solution isn't immediately apparent.