Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Tales from Washington Metro ... volume 1

The behavior of grown adults never ceases to amaze me -- especially when it comes to commuting. The fact that I have enough material to even think about writing a blog about it is a little scary.

I take a commuter train (similar to Amtrak) into Union Station where I pick up the metro. Every morning, it's the same people. In other words, I see middle aged lady with long mousy brown hair and ankle-length flowy skirts Monday thru Friday. And every morning, she's pushing and shoving. Pushes to get on the train, pushes to get off. I'm typically only one or two persons behind her, so I usually get the benefit of eye-rolling without being caught. Mostly, I'm still too exhausted to give a rat's fat behind, but the day that she pushes me we're going to have a problem.

She stiff-armed someone on the escalator.
Alright, back that caboose up. Lady, you do this every single morning and I've got news for you: the pushing and shoving doesn't get you to the train any faster than if you, like me ... took your time. We get bottle-necked every single morning into the escalators; and inevitably ... if you keep this up? Someone's going to get hurt. So you can what, get to your desk early? I mean really now. You've got to be at least 40 ... this behavior stopped being acceptable past age 5.

I'm working up the courage to tell her to friggin knock it off because it really doesn't get her to destination any faster; but at this point, after a solid 2 months of watching this happen? You clearly can't fix stupid. Good god, what would happen if she missed her metro train? (GASP) Another one shows up 2-3 minutes later.
Holy travesty.

Saw someone yesterday pull their t-shirt open and check their boobs out.
Yes, sweetheart, they're still there. Pardon me while I snicker from behind my newspaper.


  1. LOL, the general public is all sorts of ridiculous. Staying tuned for Tales from Washington Metro's future volumes! :)

  2. It surprises me what people will talk about on the train...I've heard people talk about how they're cheating on their husbands...bad.

  3. People watching has got to be one of my favorite things to do ever... sometimes (a lot of the time) it makes me feel so much better about myself haha

  4. I agree the DC metro has characters. And the funniest things happen when people don't think others are "looking". Like you can ride the train surrounded by people and no one notices that you're digging up your nose!